Rebirth: Strap Em Up, Its Go Time



My name is Mike Roberts, and I’m not the fastest man alive.

First things first. It’s good to be back. Second, how bad ass is that picture? If that doesn’t do anything for ya, well … you suck. Sorry.

Good at running. I don’t aspire to be, but for some dumb reason, I do aspire to run 26.2 miles in Oct 2010. There’s a little diddy called the Marine Corps Marathon that spans said 26.2 miles that for some reason many many people run every year.

The very idea of running marathons of any length has eluded me for … well since the day I drew breath. It’s a historically dumb idea.  Not everyone can do it, even the ones who train for months. What do you get for doing it; “it” being running (not driving mind you) 26.2 miles ? A number that you get to frame or cherish that was stapled to your chest for 26.2 miles, the satisfaction and any number of injuries incurred along training or during said 26.2 miles (it might be impossible to communicate the running of 26.2 miles to those who prefer to drive that kind of distance rather than train for and run it).

A line of questioning might have already started in your head. Haven’t you already blogged about your running escapades? Why haven’t you written/blogged in forever? What’s with the long intro about nothing? Didn’t Paul already use that picture for an entry? Who are you? What’s up with your stupid foot? Why are so you incredibly handsome? What have you been up to these last few weeks? Is the brace working? Would you mind if I ordered 2 appetizers for dinner with a salad? Would you eat some of my boneless wings if I can’t finish? Do you have insurance now? Are you running now? How often are you running? Can I finish that?

The answer to your first question is shaddup.

The answers to the rest of the questions are: 1) Yes, I’m gonna fucking eat those wings before you do and, 2) Shut up.

For those who are new to the story, lets do a quick recap of me: I suck at running, I’m outta shape, I decide to do this running thing with Paul which for some reason leads to the end goal of running the MCM in 2010,  foot/ankle hurts at first but think nothing of it, I tried to run for a few weeks with a hurt ankle/foot, saw doctor, doctor said foot sucks because of some stupid tendon thing that sucks, I reply “Jigga Whaaaaaa?”, I lose job and subsequent insurance, I decide not to run to keep foot out of danger because people tell me that’s a smart move, I don’t run for a month because its incredibly easy not to, grow tired of not doing it and throw caution into the wind and play in our last flag football game of the season, foot feels fine that night and even better the day after, decide to give the whole running thing another shot, do a 2 mile run thats a little bit off my old pace but do not feel any sort of pain in foot/ankle day of or after, be super lazy and take 2 more weeks off because its incredibly easy to do, have epiphany of sorts at Camden Yards to fucking do this.


Innocently enough, I just wanted to lose a little weight with this little endeavor, not really expecting to actually do the MCM.

But now I do. I want to run the Marine Corp Marathon. I want to train for it. I want to run the last quarter mile uphill as all my muscles feel like acid. I want to be able to say I did something that (in the grand scope of things) almost no one does. I want to be able to point to this dumb blog and say that I turned myself from an overweight lazy (but still crazy sexy) man of town into a someone that can do what many, if not everyone, said I could never do.

Fuck you. I want to do it.

Fuck you. I can do it.

Fuck you. I will do it.

Fuck you. Tell me I can’t do it, I need that more than I need “You can do it”.


One Response to “Rebirth: Strap Em Up, Its Go Time”

  1. We’re Gonna Run, I Swear « The Running Jerks Says:

    […] Mike and I know I’ve written this post once or twice before. Time isn’t my friend anymore and I’m actually excited to run this time. This […]

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