It’s All Your Fault

by

UncleSamJerkIt was a tough weekend here and the Frommelt Alliance Run Training (F.A.R.T. “tee hee”) Headquarters. Besides being a runner, I am also a very mediocre mixed-sex adult softball player. Because Mother Nature has been a cruel bitch this past spring, we had four games to play over the weekend, which cut into my running. At the same time, I developed a complete lack of motivation. I skipped a run on Friday, ran for only 2.5 miles on Saturday and didn’t run on Sunday. This bothered me, because for the past two months, I’ve been pretty consistent in my freakish devotion to running. I think, however, that I’ve figured out the problem.

The problem, dear reader, is you.

Let me explain. In the past, I’ve been running solely for my own personal gratification. When Mike and I started this blog, we let the cat out of the bag. Waves of congratulatory emails, texts and comments poured in. I felt accomplished. I was making a change in my life. Happy ending. Cut to black. Paul’s a hero.

But wait… you mean to tell me I have to keep it up or I look like fool? I’m now expected to make good on a promise to which I already received my award? I’ve already gotten my accolades for deciding to not be a fat slob. Now it becomes a job. Now it becomes expected.

I know that nobody really cares if I’m 200 pounds or 300 pounds or 1,000 pounds. In fact, most of my friends would get a kick out of my failure, including Mike. I believe, however, you would probably feel cheated if I up and quit. Mike and I made a pretty big deal about this. To quit now would kind of be like an ending to a Paul Thomas Anderson movie (i.e. thrilling opening act; intriguing middle; I end up killing Mike with a bowling pin).

So anyways, I think I’m back on track with a great 10-kilometer run today (more on that in my next post). As much as you jerks are trying to stop me from succeeding, I will not be denied… I hope.

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